Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Unsolicited Advice

That would be me providing those soon to get referrals some "been there done that" advice. I can do this just cuz I know so many of you soon to be moms!! Gaaaw I can not wait until March referrals start coming in! Our original LID was 3/29/06!
  • This experience is your own. Although many have traveled this road before you, your child will have her own transitions it might be easy it might be the hardest thing you ever go through.
  • Attachment is a Process. I can honestly say it has taken Sophie a year to fully trust and believe we are her family. Granted her first 3 months were filled with surgeries and recovery....but hind sight being 20/20 it took her a year.
  • You will have to go back to China one day to "truly" visit your child's birth country.
  • The jet lag going to China is not bad at all. Jet lag when you get home will kick your A$$.
  • Make a list of things that you want to buy. Everything is really inexpensive, but you don't want to come home with a bunch of stuff that you can pick up at a flea market.
  • Buy quality dresses in many different sizes if you think that you might take pics every year in traditional Chinese clothing.
  • Don't make your husband where traditional Chinese clothing....unless he is Chinese. Thats just me. I crack up every time I see some poor white guy in a pic at the white swan wearing some mandarin collar jacket.
  • If you can try to stay at the Victory. It will save you lots of $$$....if $$$ is not an issue stay at the White Swan it is part of the experience.....but don't expect much. (we stayed at the victory. We had 2 big rooms.)
  • If you have a little one still taking a hot bottle you will need a thermos. Sophie was still taking a bottle but was happy to eat solid food most of the time.
  • Carry or wear your baby as much as you can. GZ is hot, so wearing your baby there is sweaty.
  • Buy a stroller. Waiting at immigration stinks if you have to hold a little munchkin who you have been holding for the last 17 hours. She wants some space and you are tired. Buy the stroller and give it to your mom.
  • It is ok if you don't totally LOVE your child's province capital. This does not mean that you don't love her or that you are not grateful to China for this amazing child. Sophie is from the coal capital of China...nuff said.
  • If your child seems attached to certain items that she is wearing like her shoes just let her wear them. Sophie would carry the shoes that she wore the day we met her to bed.
  • Bring a scrapbook page to put your child "red" footprint, thumb print or hand print. Also bring a scrapbook page to have the director and/or nanny write something to your daughter.
  • Good gifts to bring are yankee candle car air fresheners. They are flat and people in China will hang them in their apartments or with the 100 others in their car.
  • Small sample/stocking stuffer perfumes are also a small and easy gift to transport.
  • Eat at the Cow and Bridge early in the evening.
  • McDonalds tastes the same as it does here and you will have at least one day when you think it is the best freakin meal you have ever had!
  • If Ben can go to China and eat all different types of food......you can too!
  • You can use your ATM cards to get money out in China. Just be sure to let your bank know:P
  • If you are not traveling with a travel group, bring more than one bottle of the meds you are most likely use, just in case you spill!
  • Try to buy gifts for special occasions like 16th birthday, graduation etc.
  • Try to blog every day. Even if you don't post you can post everything when you have more time. I wished I had, I figured I would write about everything when I got home....wrong. To busy having jet lag kick my a$$
  • Relax...yeah right:) But do your best to enjoy every moment that you can! This has been a long time coming for both of you!


Sandra said...

Since I have BTDT, I can say that I agree 110% with all of these. Great advice for parents-to-be. I was just going through the girls Chinese dresses tonight to see which one they are going to wear for CNY. I bought a ton of dresses in China and I still have three more sizes for the girls to grow into.

Isabella's Mommy and Daddy said...

Great advice..
I will need all this when it is my turn..
Have a Great Week..

3D said...

Thx for the advice!

Saving this post for when the time comes.

Keep smilin!

Lindsay said...

Totally agree with the advice on either blogging or journaling - you will want to revisit the details so be sure to record them.

And attachment: yes, it's been a year for us too and there are still areas we have to work on. Attachment is steps forward and steps back and sometimes the steps forward are so tiny you will not notice they are happening. But they are.

Lisa and Tate said...

Great advise and information.... I will save this post for reference. What are some ideas to buy for special gifts??? Anything you chose to advise is highly appreciated.


Colleen said...

I too agree with everything! I had taken your advise for the yankee candle stuff - and I did potpouri envelopes too. I wish I thought of that scrapbook idea! Perfect.

We came home with about 15 dresses. One for each year. They were so cheap.

kris said...

very good tips- especially about the lifebook thing, would not have even thought of that. though i feel like I'll be so overwhelmed with emotion i'll forget to carry the paper down with me to wherever i'm meeting my child.

sea star said...

Damn, I thought J would look hot in one of those spiffy Mandarin shirts. ;)

Pug Mama said...

Now I know you'll think that D looks foolish in his hot, manly Chinese jacket when we take our family picture!

PIPO said...

Hehehe....I don't have anyone to put in a mandarin collar but I DO have one exciting dress :0)

Thanks for the input...I'll be sure to be using a lot of it.

I would hope I won't be sweaty in GZ when I'm there. Heh, if I get through the whole thing without puking I'll be thrilled.

Catherine said...

So much great advice! I've already bookmarked this for future use and if you think of any other stuff feel free to share!

It's so cool to be getting closer...finally!

Buckeyes & Eggrolls said...

That was some amazing advice and I totally agree with everything! I wish we could have seen some of Maddy's country when we were there but we;ve decided to do just like you said, go back some day to truly visit and take it all in!

Colleen said...

Great advice!!!