Friday, July 24, 2009

Monday, July 20, 2009

New Grand Prize Added!

A new grand prize has been added! Check it out! Just Click on Ellis and she will bring you right where you need to go! If you are the grand prize winner you will have a choice of grand prizes!! Very Cool!

Shhhh......can you hear that???? I think I can hear your quilt squares calling from the plastic box you have them stored in!! The lady who made Sophie's quilt and I are trying to help bring Ellis home. As of right now the bidding to have Robin make your 100 wishes quilt is up to $85....still much less than what I paid Robin to make Sophie's quilt. Head over to here and bid bid bid!!

Friday, July 17, 2009

Public Service Announcement

As many of you know Sophie has really struggled with sleeping. She does not have "night terrors". She hyper vigilant when it comes to going to sleep, she fights sleep like its the enemy. Once asleep she tends to be very restless. When she was in her crib up against our bed she would get up on her knees and fall back down on the mattress....I thought for sure she was going to break my nose while I slept and she dove on to the bed. We have talked to the attachment therapist about these sleep issues, and he of course has said that it is not uncommon. But the truth of the matter is that if she is tired and not well rested we can not do the attachment work that we need to do to help her feel safe, secure and loved. What to do????? Well my friends I have started using a homeopathic sleep aid made especially for children to help Sophie relax and have a restful sleep. It has made all the difference in the world for the both of us!! A tired cranky toddler with a tired and cranky mommy will not have the energy to have fun together and strengthen attachment.

We have started using Calms Forte for Kids and it is like magic. This is not a sleeping pill. This has allowed Sophie to relax and get the sleep she so desperately needs. This product doesn't even come with a kid proof cap it is that safe! You can buy it at vitamin or health food stores. The directions recommend dissolving under the tongue. Yeah good luck with that, the trick is for your munchkin not to chew the tiny tablet. They taste sweet and dissolve quickly. You give the tablets in 15 minute increments before bedtime. I give Sophie 4 doses of 2 tablets every night and it works great. No more taking an hour to fall asleep, no more waking in the middle of the night, she is talking less in her sleep and the restlessness has all but disappeared.

This product has been a life saver for the both of us!!

Saturday, July 11, 2009

100 Wishes Quilt

Hey girls. Is your daughter home from China and you still have all of her quilt squares sitting in a box??? Are you trying to figure out how the heck you will find the time to make her quilt??? You have to make her called your mother a zillion times "reminding" her that you needed her wish and quilt square! Well my faithful blog readers ( all 4 of you:) I have a solution to your little quilt problem!

Click over to bring ellis home and and you can bid on getting your girls quilt made by Robin. Robin made Sophie's quilt and she loooves it. It is the perfect size for snuggling on the couch, playing on the floor, and traveling in the car. Bidding is starting at $60 well below what I paid Robin to make Soph's quilt. So get those quilt squares together and go bid!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Chip in

Yeah this is not a rant about the chip in button. I give up. Plus I just love this low on cash mommy:)

She is raffling off some cool stuff so head over and hit the dang chip in last time!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

July Already!

  • I can't believe that W@lmart has started putting out back to school supplies....I am NOT ready for that thank-you-very-much!
  • I went looking for a little dance or gymnastic class for Sophie. Classes start at $40 a month for dance, $50 -$70 for gymnastics a month. Seriously??? She is three years old!!!
  • I should find out next week where I will be teaching. I hope this move doesn't bite me in the a$$.
  • I usually make the kids doctor and dentist appointments in the summer so I don't take a day off from work.....I am sick of going to the doctors and dentist during summer vacation.
  • I am back on the couch. I need to start running again, I will have to start over. Sucks.
  • Sophie is doing great. We were having some really good luck with sleep, but apparently that is over and she is back to waking up couple times during the night.
  • Sophie is wearing big girl panties! I would like to say it is a done deal but she is still having accidents. She does not like for me to "try" to be the boss of her peepee's.
  • Rent Revolutionary Road. Great movie.
  • Red B*x movie rentals rock. You can't beat a movie rental for a buck!!

Hope everyone is having a great summer!

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

It is Different

You do not want to believe that parenting your child from China is going to be different than how you parented your other kids. She is just your child, just like your others....right???? You love her just as much as if you had given birth to her yourself! But the reality is that it has to be different to meet the needs of this child. The child that comes to you with experiences that you will never know. Experiences that impact her ability to love and trust completely.

To be honest parenting Sophie is different in as many ways as it is/was the same with Ben and Hannah. Of course the initial differences are in the beginning when we were really focusing on the attachment with bottle feedings and carrying her as much as we could ( with hind sight being 20/20 those are two things that I wished we held on to longer). When Ben and Hannah were 16 months old we were fostering independence, for Sophie at 16 months we were trying to turn back the clock. My expectations for Sophie are the same as they are for Ben and Hannah, those things are not different.....the way we go about it is going to be different.

Yesterday we met with an attachment therapist. We are seeking help on the best way to set limits and give consequences and to increase her level of trust with us. Sophie has really done well considering all that she has been through in China as well as the surgeries and treatments she has endured here in the U.S. My girl amazes me with her strength! Sophie is very protective of her feelings. She is happy to get kisses and hugs from mommy and daddy, but more controlling when it comes "giving love". She also likes to control as much of her environment as she can, even if it is just lining up her crayons. We need to get our beautiful daughter to trust us completely....surrender to our love and care for her. I believe with help from the AT that we will be able to accomplish this in a short time.

One of the areas that I have really struggled with is discipline. The strategies I used with Ben and Hannah as well as with my kiddos in my classroom do not work. No stickers, or bribes will work. Potty training has been an eye opening experience. At this time Sophie does not demonstrate a desire to please me like most kiddos, although when she does something that she knows I will get excited about she will tell me "She did it" but when I try to help.....she fights me. Sophie is a good girl, but she has to learn consequences or we will have some big problems ahead of us! She can be defiant and oppositional. The challenge for me is shaking out the typical three year old stuff from the behaviors related to her trauma and loss. It is not so easy.

I am a student at heart. Give me books, resources, research and I will pour over it and discuss it to death:) So my friends I share with you my list;

The Connected Child. I read this before going to China. This is a must have!

Taming the Tiger while it is a Kitten. I wish I had listened to this before going to China. We are applying strategies now and I believe they are helping.

The Happiest Toddler on the Block. Recommended by Nancy Thomas. Kind of goofy but I have incorporated some of these strategies and they seem to help diffuse a hissy fit:)

Beyond Consequences, Logic and Control. Recommended by our AT. I like it! Every adoptive parent needs to read this book!

Beyond Consequences Volume 2. I have not started this one yet. It is a continuation of the first book and I expect it to be just as helpful.

All of our babies come to us with attachment issues of one type or another. Our children have suffered a loss. Foster care does not guarantee a child will not have attachment issues. Sure foster care is better than laying in a crib all day....that is if the foster care is good. Facilitating healthy attachment is a process that continues well beyond your one year "gotcha day".

If you have any other resources that you just loooove and can't do without leave me the info!