tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post2625451911196009150..comments2023-07-24T11:12:36.893-04:00Comments on A Beautiful Mess: You Can't Buy Chinese CultureA Beautiful Messhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/06743224608400210594noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-7429667963405783512010-01-25T12:27:55.022-05:002010-01-25T12:27:55.022-05:00Thanks for sharing this...& yes, I agree with ...Thanks for sharing this...& yes, I agree with Lindsay as well...so perfectly stated. <br /><br />I enrolled my 5 yr. old daughter in Mandarin class this semester...bottom line, she hates it. Anyone who knows me around this blogosphere knows my daughter is EXTREMELY outgoing & loves to participate in LIFE! ;) Not this class...according to her teachers she doesn't even repeat the words. So...lesson learned.<br /><br />Our plan is to expose her to many things Chinese, Chinese/American...let her know it's out there, if you will...to gain exposure, to motivate her to ask questions, to soak it in...she's smart, she will ask questions & then we'll go from there. It's her choice, we're here to support with open, loving arms & ears!<br /><br />Great topic of discussion!Patriciahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09662206547720030431noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-12625851123407114862010-01-24T11:57:30.335-05:002010-01-24T11:57:30.335-05:00I, too, am hoping to give our daughter the languag...I, too, am hoping to give our daughter the language just because I think it is her best tool to discovering her history, if she chooses too. I wrote about it here - http://cavaticasweb.wordpress.com/2010/01/24/we-cant-make-her-chinese/Cavaticahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02318305648322145681noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-82872711018937454172010-01-24T11:50:36.272-05:002010-01-24T11:50:36.272-05:00You can teach it from a Western lens, but unless y...You can teach it from a Western lens, but unless you actually live and immerse within it... your understanding remains that of an academic textbook rather than a natural thrive in the culture.Mei Linghttp://sisterheping.wordpress.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-42643720149244205342010-01-22T15:01:22.992-05:002010-01-22T15:01:22.992-05:00Yoli-thanks for the comment. You really have me r...Yoli-thanks for the comment. You really have me reconsidering my thoughts on Chinese school....A Beautiful Messhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06743224608400210594noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-55554442786845558122010-01-21T14:28:07.223-05:002010-01-21T14:28:07.223-05:00I think a happy medium is best. For us is not abou...I think a happy medium is best. For us is not about giving them the trappings of culture, though they are very much aware of it but about returning them their native tongue. In the end, being able to communicate in their country and with their people is a "small step" towards finding their cultural identity. No guarantees of course but so far so good with our kids. Glad you are touching on this topic.Yolihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06068063513978782703noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-88797206451481767062010-01-19T13:26:49.986-05:002010-01-19T13:26:49.986-05:00Lindsey's comments are great - so thought prov...Lindsey's comments are great - so thought provoking. Thanks for the perspective.<br /><br />And here's a note from a friend who's been sharing her thoughts with me (taken from an email in response to the Facebook note I sent you a week ago):<br /><br />"One thing that I think would be good to touch on, is that Chinese culture in China is different than Chinese culture in America. My opinion is that children who are adopted from China, should experience the culture of the American-Born/Raised Chinese (which itself varies with when one move to America); because this is who they are similar to...not so much Chinese in China (though it's good to know this culture as well)."<br /><br />So much to think about and work through.The Gang's Momma!https://www.blogger.com/profile/12478478224173323982noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-3137995446660996852010-01-18T16:26:05.699-05:002010-01-18T16:26:05.699-05:00ditto lindsay who always has the best way of stati...ditto lindsay who always has the best way of stating the truth with eloquence.kitchuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03907460384010952009noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-66473320160156886322010-01-18T15:18:03.791-05:002010-01-18T15:18:03.791-05:00I just had a conversation last week about this ver...I just had a conversation last week about this very topic! About a dozen Chinese foreign exchange students will be attending a CNY celebration hosted by our local FCC next month. And I had to explain to these teens that - not only would it not be authentically Chinese, but that it wouldn't even be authentically Chinese-American - more China-adoptive-families authentic. We asked for their input in the planning stages and also extra grace, as some things might not be culturally sensitive or will be just plain weird to them (for example, the hundreds of girls running around wearing qi paos). But we're doing our best... and there will be lion dancers. The teens all told me not to worry so much. Heh. They've haven't been yet.a Tonggu Mommahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01365812914466181060noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-51716332734372514422010-01-18T08:57:30.796-05:002010-01-18T08:57:30.796-05:00"all we can do is our best to help our childr..."all we can do is our best to help our children build a sense of identity which honors their birth culture without making them feel as if they don't belong in their adoptive family."<br /><br />perfectly said Lidnsay!A Beautiful Messhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06743224608400210594noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-77221565156925285142010-01-18T00:08:24.875-05:002010-01-18T00:08:24.875-05:00I'd agree too: we can't teach our children...I'd agree too: we can't teach our children to be what we ourselves are not. All we can do is not ignore their first culture and heritage, no matter where our children are from. Hannah lost her birth culture and Romani language the moment her birth mother took the decision to relinquish her. I cannot teach her to be Romani any more than you can teach Sophie to be Chinese. <br /><br />But I think it is important too to understand we are not respsonsible for that loss. Life in an orphanage would have given your child Chinese language (though not perhaps her birth parents' dialect or language) and a superficial understanding of her birth culture. She would not have experienced it on a deep level, but more from the position of an outsider. In the same way I understand how & why Americans celebrate Thanksgiving, but I have no understanding of how it resonates with you emotionally. I cannot, unless it is part of my life's experiences. <br /><br />As with so many things, all we can do is our best to help our children build a sense of identity which honors their birth culture without making them feel as if they don't belong in their adoptive family.Lindsayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12711583593777948158noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-30950668337794532502010-01-17T22:31:36.228-05:002010-01-17T22:31:36.228-05:00Lillie's actually asking for Chinese lessons -...Lillie's actually asking for Chinese lessons - I found one nearby where there are different classes for kids with parents who speak Mandarin and parents who do not... hoping that helps with some of the issues raised in the blog you linked. Sigh. We can do the best we can, but yeah, we're not Chinese.Heathernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-35219637781024763602010-01-17T21:20:29.222-05:002010-01-17T21:20:29.222-05:00LOL! Get that check book out baby!LOL! Get that check book out baby!t~https://www.blogger.com/profile/16661748211204975504noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8904053107855289593.post-22528400653960765842010-01-17T20:49:34.698-05:002010-01-17T20:49:34.698-05:00I have to say that I had to agree with the video. ...I have to say that I had to agree with the video. I was nodding my head at his points (all the while the voice in my head was singing "White-Guilt, White-Guilt"). As a person who left Taiwan at 4 and returned at 13, my cousins were giggling at me as I spoke the native tongue. My mother explained that I was speaking Taiwanese with a Southern Drawl.<br /><br />That's y'all to you, my cuz.<br /><br />I was from there, but I'm not longer "of there".Johnnyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16423885759708774960noreply@blogger.com